Nothing to Lose
by Nirianne
Summary: The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell. R&R!
1. Nothing to Lose —Part 1—

**A/N:** This story was written **BEFORE** the release of the game. I didn't plot anything; this came out of my dream. So what's with this story? I have no idea. One day I dreamt of it and here it is. Took me a couple of tries to write this out (mainly I wrote this on a bus, lol)! Difficult as heck, I don't know why but yeah, it was like a challenge to me... maybe? This story may be broken up into 2 shots since it's quite long… Anyway, enjoy or not! Leave me your comments!

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

**Summary: **The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell.

* * *

><p><strong>Nothing to Lose (Part 1)<strong>

Lightning flinched at the cold breeze scraping against her torn skin, exposed against the elements. A drop of rain bounced off her eyelashes awakening the sleeping warrior. Slowly opening her eyes, her blue eyes focused upon the black abyss beneath extending for miles. The wind picked up forcing her body to sway listening to sounds of the rattling chain. Tilting up her head, her eyes focused onto a shimmering silver chain and shackles digging into her flesh. Traces of red slid down her arms staining her armor. The feathers in her hips were scorched beyond recognition while other parts of her were drenched in blood.

The sound of beating wings caught her attention. Closing her eyes, she was in no mood to speak. Hell she already knew who it was. Chaos Bahamut appeared over the horizon, halting in front of the warrior. Caius watched Lightning unmoved yet her feathers continued to quiver. He reached out grabbing her chin knowing full well she was awake. Turning her face to the side, his merciless eyes gazed upon a grotesque gash burying into her fair complexion; infection had already begun to take its toll.

"I know you can hear me, Warrior Goddess."

Lightning remained unresponsive.

"You still fight even if defeat has been granted upon you. Listen to my words carefully, Warrior Goddess, you lost everything."

Upon those words, Lightning opened her eyes staring into those amethyst eyes. "I have nothing to lose," she spoke through gritted teeth.

"You believe you have nothing more to lose?" Caius questioned with amusement.

Lightning was done; closing her eyes, she focused her energy on breathing rather than speaking in circles. Amused by the goddess' words, he commanded the large monstrosity to leave. Ascending into the sky, Caius watched Lightning dangling below on a silver thread waiting for time to pass until death consumed her.

Upon the next day, Lightning was at the mercy of heavy rain. The skies lit up spilling lightning across the horizon complimented by clapping thunder. The winds refused to show her mercy; whipping her side to side, Lightning's head collided with the stone cliff. Cursing, she felt the shackles dig deeper into her flesh yet, none of this was nothing in comparison to her hollow stomach. She counted at least a week since her untimely defeat, hanging on death's edge. No food or water slipped through her cracked lips. Bruises were black yet her fighting spirit remained strong. But, she managed to muster strength whenever Caius visited her. Today was absolutely no different.

"Still hanging in there I see."

Once again silence answered his question.

"Your little silence game does not work with me, Warrior Goddess."

Lightning twitched.

"Regardless if you wish to listen or not, I am here to relieve you of your misery."

Misery? Misery? What did he know about misery? Listening to the howling winds, she sensed an enormous power from him. Opening her eyes, she saw the purple blade aimed at her. So, was this the way things were about to end? What else did she have to live for? Her existence mattered not in a world where everybody believed she died.

Closing her eyes, she waited for the blade to strike her. She envisioned her lifeless corpse tumble down the jagged stone edges, slicing or impaling her before bittersweet death consumed her. Her time drew near.

Hearing the sword whipped, she waited. Unexpectedly, her body felt lighter yet it wasn't deaths release, no. The chains above her snapped allowing gravity to pull her down, onto the awaiting back of Chaos Bahamut. Grunting, Lightning mustered her remaining strength to stand up and face Caius. She didn't need her sword to defeat him; she believed she was confident enough to challenge him in shackles. Confidence bubbled within her for a moment but she was no fool; in her current condition she was easily beat.

Placing the sword onto his back, Caius crossed his arms, eyes piercing Lightning. "You wish to fight me?"

"Can it." Lightning hissed. "I don't need to listen to your mockery, Caius. If you want to kill me, do it now."

Caius took a step forward forcing Lightning to take a step back. "There is no rush to end your life on a short notice," Caius paused and lowered his voice. "Keeping you alive already proved to be a wise choice."

Lightning scowled. Turning her gaze upon the abyss, the depths called out to her.

"You believe jumping will be the answer?"

"And you're going to stop me?" Lightning snapped.

"Try."

Lightning moved to the edge gazing into the unknown. Her foot was at the edge waiting for the precise moment. Closing her eyes she took a step forward but her body did not perform what she commanded; instead her body was spun around feeling a fist driven into her stomach. Her eyes snapped open and looked down at his fist paused on her stomach. Everything happened too quickly; Lightning's eyes rolled into the back of her head and succumbed to arms of her sworn enemy.

* * *

><p>"Nghhh... What...?"<p>

Darkness. Not even a glimpse of light. Just darkness. Once again she felt her body suspended. Where was it this time she wondered? Was it over a pit of smoldering lava? No, there was no heat. Perhaps she was dangling over another cliff? No, that wasn't right.

"Where am I?"

Her answer arrived in the form of sounds of scurrying rodents across the drenched floor. Sounds of dripping water tapped against the stone floor over and over again. The stench of mildew told her this was a dungeon. Her eyes blinked, wondering what was in store. Was Caius going to end her here, in a dungeon beneath some fortified fortress? Perhaps. The door clicked. Turning her head, she listened to heavy footsteps clicking against the pavement. It was too dark to see his expression but she knew, he watched her.

"Awake?" he questioned. "You slept for a week, Warrior."

"...I have a name..." Lightning muttered.

"Lightning," Caius answered.

Lightning looked at him.

"What do _you_ want?"

"Do you wish to eat?" he questioned. He knew she was tough but even fools would not last long without proper nourishment.

"No," Lightning snapped. "I rather rot in here than have mercy given to me."

"You like making things difficult, don't you?"

Caius approached her reaching out holding her chin. Lightning recoiled from the touch.

"Don't touch me."

"What are you going to do about it?" he asked, circling her.

His hand reached out to the scorched feathers adorned on her hip. Ripping out a bunch of feathers, he threw them aside. Lightning flinched.

"Don't touch me!" she hissed thrashing within the bonds. She cursed at him and these damned shackles!

"Very well," Caius' hand retreated. "I will free you, Goddess only if you vow to be good."

"Suddenly I'm some kind of mutt?" Lightning shot. "I don't need to be freed!"

Already the sounds of snapping chains echoed; Lightning, without warning plummeted onto the floor and landed awkwardly on her ankle. Caius pulled her to her feet as they once again were eye to eye in the darkness. Pulling her by the shackles, he guided her through the door, exiting down an azure pathway aligned with monstrous pillars and solidified beasts.

Arriving at their destination, Lightning was out of breath. Pushing her into a room, her eyes were fixed upon a large open spaced area with the view of Valhalla. Below was an area for her to bathe. Golden fixtures lined the tub's white tiles. The flowing water was green, mixed with herbal fragrances with bubbles lifting off its steamy surface. Moving her eyes toward the curved stone railing, the thought of escape flashed through her mind but was immediately crushed. She was reminded she was several hundred meters off the ground. Plummeting to her doom was not her idea of escape.

"Cleanse yourself," Caius said.

Glancing down at the iron shackles, how on earth was she supposed to do anything? The idea of bathing only appealed to her as the medicinal waters would heal her wounds. Moving behind her, Caius unsnapped buckles on her armor. Startled, Lightning spun around and shoved him away. She shot him an icily glare.

"You require assistance undressing do you not?"

"I can do it on my own!" she spat. Lifting her hands she hissed, "Remove these."

"And you vow not to escape or rather: plummet to your doom?"

Through gritted teeth she replied, "Fine."

Pulling out a silver key from his sleeve, he eyed her wearily. Lightning was no fool. Even without weapons she could potentially inflict harm but in her weakened state, he knew she wouldn't dare. The iron shackles fell onto the marbled floor and Lightning gazed upon her bloodied wrists; the stench of infection repulsed her. Rubbing them, she shot him a dirty look.

"Get out."

Amused by Lightning's words, he exited locking the door tightly. With peace once again granted, she moved her attention to blinds for her to change behind.

Removing her armor proved to be hell for Lightning; every inch of her body screamed in agony while her blue eyes focused in hideous bruises and deep gashes. Once everything was removed, Lightning cautiously stepped out wearily for Caius. She made damn sure he was no where around. The coast was clear; heading to the curved tub, she dipped her toes in testing the water. Only a mere touch of the water proved refreshing. Looking over her shoulder once more, she lowered herself down, biting her lip. Her wounds stung feeling as if they were set ablaze by invisible flames.

The cuts on her wrist screamed in pain yet they were healing. Green magic weaved through each of her wounds sealing them shut. All signs of puss vanished leaving darkened spots as a nasty reminder. Touching the side of her face, she touched the gash and even it too fully healed.

"I look hideous..." Lightning whispered aloud. Her reflection wobbled on the water's surface.

Scanning over her body, the amount of scars bothered her; tracing a finger over a foot long gash down her leg, she wondered how she was bested in battle. She trained under the best but perhaps... Shaking the past out of her head, she focused her energy on cleaning up. She had a feeling Caius would rudely interrupt her peace. Running hands over her arms and legs, inside, she felt a bit better. Just a little.

Quickly getting out of the tub, she hastily moved to behind the blinds spotting a bundle of white cloth. Inching toward it, she picked it up. The bundle rolled out into a white gown with laces.

"He has to be joking..." Lightning muttered. What was she, a fool?

Scanning every inch of the fabric, she discovered it was slightly transparent. Placing a hand under one of the frilly layers, she saw five fingers. Her frown widened. What other choice did she have? She was not going to walk around this place in the nude! Without much of a choice, Lightning slipped on the gown and prepared to drown in her own misery.


	2. Nothing to Lose —Part 2—

**A/N:** Wow, a big **thank you** to everybody who reviewed! I never thought a story such as this would get reviews in the first place! Thank you, everybody :) Here's the next installment of _Nothing to Lose._

Oh, before the story gets deeper, I will say this: the rating will go up. I won't say why or how but it will go up. You have been warned, yo. From now on, chapters will get darker and maybe twisted.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

**Summary: **The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell.

* * *

><p><strong>Nothing to Lose (Part 2)<strong>

Gazing over the balcony, everything was the same yet so different. The grounds on Valhalla were bruised beyond recognition. Lightning leaned forward, her mind spinning from recent events; she was no longer a protector for the deity, Etro. She no longer would see anybody who mattered. She would no longer see Serah. Gripping tightly onto the concrete railing, blood drained out of her knuckles. Fixating her gaze upon Chaos Bahamut, she watched the monstrosity soar through the skies, tearing apart any creature it came across. With a swipe of its talons, an unfortunate flying fiend succumbed to instant death dropping out of the sky into the rampaging sea and painting the blue waters red.

_So much for escape..._ Lightning mused.

"I see you've cleansed yourself,"

Lightning spun around hugging her form.

"Don't you ever learn to knock?" she spat.

Changing the subject Caius said, "Come dine with me. Dinner is served. I believe even a warrior such as yourself requires food."

"I don't _need_ your sympathy, Caius." Lightning spoke with venom. "First you defeat me and now you treat me as if I'm some precious doll."

He remained silent. Walking to the door, he turned to her. Lightning refused to budge until she failed to notice Chaos Bahamut behind her, shoving her with its talons. Stumbling forward, her hand instantly moved to her back reaching for... Nothing. Lightning pursed her lips remembering her blade destroyed upon the final confrontation. With another flick, Lightning stumbled to Caius, still hugging her body.

Closing the door, they walked in silence listening to the approaching storm. Winds picked up forcing waves to crash against the shoreline, wounding it once more. Descending down the spiral staircase, they arrived in the dining hall. A long table waited for them covered in a white and golden silk table cloth with black candles on top with flickering flames. Lightning darted to the end of the table where priceless silverware was laid out. In front of her were three bizarre dishes laid out as: appetizer, main course and dessert. Refusing to do anything, she placed her hands on her lap gripping on the gown.

"Are you not hungry?" Caius questioned picking up a knife.

"None of your business."

"Or would you rather be hand fed? Perhaps you need assistance as I am holding silverware?"

Lightning tensed. Expelling a huff, she reached out to the knife and fork stabbing it into the chunk of meat. Placing the meat in her mouth, her taste buds rejoiced. Chewing it, she continued to glare daggers at Caius who sat at the end of the table. Her view was obstructed by a large deep purple glazed vase decorated with dead, dried roses.

The sound of silverware was never interrupted by speech. Setting aside the utensils, Caius pushed out of the chair heading to Lightning. Once again he was met with her glare. She too, placed down her utensils and left the chair, heading to the door. With both hands grasped tightly onto the golden handles, the door rattled but refused to open.

"Leaving already?"

"What does it look like?" Lightning shook the door handles again.

Amused by her actions, he slammed a hand on the door. She spun around. Barricaded by both of his arms, Lightning quickly covered herself yet she directly looked into his eyes. She was not going to expose her weakness to him.

"Open the door."

Listening to a soft chuckle, she heard, "And pray tell why would I let you out of my sight?"

Goosebumps formed on her skin. "Just open the damn door! Surely a simple request wouldn't be too hard to follow, can it?"

"You will not leave until I say so. You are my prisoner and you will do everything I ask of you in exchange for your freedom."

Freedom?

"Lies!" Lightning shot. "I wouldn't believe anything that comes out of your mouth! I rather have death eat me alive than listen to your false truths!"

Grabbing her wrists, he gripped tightly forcing her to look at him. Lightning winced, feeling pain surge from her wrists. Lightning cursed inside; her wrists were not fully healed from the blasted shackles. Abruptly ripping her off the door, he pulled her toward a set of velvet couches. Throwing her down, he held her tightly within his embrace whispering in her ear.

"Reveal yourself to me, Lightning."

Fingers moved to the back of her gown untying each ribbon, one by one. Pressing the gown against her body, she felt his gaze scanning her for imperfections. Running a finger down her spine, Lightning's skin crawled forcing an uncontrolled reaction; she jabbed him in the ribs with her elbow. The action forced him to pull her closer to him. Slithering an arm around her, he ripped her hands away from her chest. Pressing a palm against her rapidly beating heart, Lightning balled her fists. Her back faced him while her mind went into overdrive. Struggling again, his other arm tightened around her waist. Closing her eyes, what she would give to have a sword right now and stab him through his blackened heart.

Pressing his lips against her shoulder, he waited for her to struggle. At least the effort would entertain him. "I presume you've never been with a man before?"

Through gritted teeth she replied, "It's none of your business."

"Pity."

Removing his hands away from her, he lifted her off him as Lightning quickly tied loose laces securely hugging her body.

"We shall continue this some other time, Lightning. I expect you to be ready."

Rushing to the door, the sound of an unlocking door clicked. Pushing down the handles, Lightning dashed out of the room before Caius changed his mind. She absolutely had nothing to offer! They were sworn enemies and yet even after her fall, humiliation continued as his prisoner and—

"Lover..."

* * *

><p>Lightning counted a month exactly since her defeat. Locked away in a room on the highest tower, she was lost in thought staring at the silent seas. Huffing, she made her way to the door, silently opening it. The white gown came in contact with the polished floor, heading to places unexplored. The walls of another hall were aligned with paintings and portraits of sorts. One especially forced Lightning to stop and stare. It was a portrait of a blonde haired maiden, as bright as the largest star in the sky. Strings of light skidded across the skies flashing light upon the portrait. Lightning's eyes focused on the armor the woman wore.<p>

"It's... It's like mine..."

Upon another flash of light, the portrait once again revealed another secret: the face of the maiden was scratched off. Reaching out to touch the golden frame, Lightning's hand was caught.

"Cease your curiosity this instant." Caius warned.

Lightning snatched her hand back, once again eyeing the portrait.

"Who is she?"

"That is none of your concern."

"How is it not my concern..."

Lightning trailed off with her eyes taking her to the next portrait. Unmistakably the same woman in a lavish, deep cut gown with her face scratched off. Beside her was Caius, one much younger than the man she knew today.

"Was she your wife?"

Glancing to the side, he was gone. She was one who never bothered in the business of others but Lightning knew—no, felt Caius' strong connection with the mystery maiden. Resuming her walk, Lightning stumbled upon a library. Pushing open the wooden doors, rows upon rows of shelves were at her disposal. Running a finger over a book, it was printed in a foreign text. Some letters appeared oddly similar to letters in Cocoon though slightly altered. Maybe this was a prototype language?

Turning down an aisle, Lightning came across more books: the history of Cocoon and Gran Pulse. Removing the book from the dusty shelf, she focused on images of monstrous beasts roaming Gran Pulse over a thousand years ago. Behemoths were much larger than the ones she previously fought.

Placing down the book, she picked up another.

Running a finger over its golden inlays Lightning said aloud, "There's no title..."

Opening it, the pages were blank. Flipping through the pages, all Lightning found were stains and holes yet nothing. She pursed her lips; something was suspicious about the book. Turning around, she spotted an odd looking lamp. The thought was foolish but why not? Moving to the lamp, she turned the knob with her other hand holding the book beneath the floral shade. Words shone on the book burning their untold tale.

"A lone warrior," Lightning read aloud. "A warrior of time destined to live in eternal solitude until the world falls."

Reading through each sentence, each was filled with anguish. How could one man suffer through an eternity alone with a heart brewed with never ending hatred of time? Flipping the next page, it showed a picture of a girl, perhaps in her teens lying on her death bed. There was no name or inscription. Lightning moved her finger across the page. Gasping, the page ignited. Throwing the book away, she watched the book swallowed by fire. Within seconds, the book vanished.

"What… What the hell was that about?" Rubbing her arms, things were becoming too strange for her. First it was the maiden with the scratched off face and now it was this girl. Were they both connected to Caius? Perhaps. Looking over her shoulder, Lightning mumbled, "This place gives me the creeps. I better leave before the book shelves start to crumble,"

* * *

><p>Later that evening, Lightning dined alone. Strange; she always thought being left alone was comforting but with the image of that woman and girl burned deeply in her mind, Lightning couldn't focus. Placing down the utensils, she sighed. Quite frankly she was over the age of dwelling over other people's problems and all that rubbish. As much as she tried, their faces continued to play in her mind much to her dismay.<p>

"I should have never opened that book," Lightning muttered, rubbing the edge of the wine glass with her finger. The liquid was still. "This is stupid!"

Pushing out of the chair, she made her way to the glass windows. Unlocking it, she pushed it open for breeze to slip past her, granting life to her gown. Beyond the horizon was the sea. Beyond the skies was that menace, Chaos Bahamut. Thinking of escape was easier than doing so. She needed weapons but where could she locate them? Crossing her arms, her mind continued the questions: what if she managed to escape? Where was she to go? The Time Gates were destroyed—all of them.

Lightning suddenly tensed feeling ghostly fingers stroking her arms.

"Mesmerized by the sea?" Caius whispered.

Peeling his hands off her, Lightning scowled and spun around.

"Don't touch me."

"You keep saying those words yet you do nothing of it," he took another step forward.

Lightning balled her fists, punching him square in the jaw. Unmoved, he was amused. The received reaction was unexpected; he smirked.

"Keeping you alive was a good choice. I have not been this amused since I had company last."

No, she refused to fall for his verbal tricks. Quickly storming past him, he silently spoke against her ear. Grinding her teeth, she balled her fists and about to deliver a punch but Caius knew; he smoothly caught her pulling her close.

"You are eager to resume what we started, do you not? Your wish will be granted,"

Pushing against his armor plating, Lightning was having none of it! Pushing as hard as she could, she used every ounce of strength in her body to escape. Caius grinned, picking her off her feet and threw her over his shoulder effortlessly. Throwing her against the wall, Lightning was lifted off the ground with both hands pinned above her. The amount of disgust boiled within her blood, reflected off her enraged sapphire gems. Running a hand beneath her gown, Lightning flinched balling her fists tightly.

Now eye to eye, Caius questioned trailing kisses to her lips, "What can you offer me?"

Fingers traced her curves and moved to her fingers.

"You despicable excuse for a life," Lightning said feeling his lips against her neck. "May the gods curse hell upon you."

"They already have," Lightning flinched. Caius continued. "The gods cursed me, granted me immortality…"

Pressuring her wrists tighter, Lightning felt the bones in her wrist grind against one another.

"Now, enough about me. Why not we focus about you? You never answered me what you can offer me, Warrior Goddess."

"Death," Lightning spat. "You want death? I'll give you death."

Lightning suddenly delivered a headbutt. The abrupt action forced him to release her. Falling on the ground, Lightning rolled away and darted toward a table. Grabbing an elongated green glass vase, she smashed it against the table and aimed the jagged edge at him. Even without a sword, she would fight. Recovered from Lightning's headbutt, Caius merely spun around faced with an interesting situation; Lightning armed herself with a broken vase. Heading toward her, he completely ignored the shards scattered on the rug. Maneuvering herself behind the velvet couch, she poised the vase high, aiming it directly at his beating heart.

"Come any closer and I swear I'll give death you rightfully deserve!" Lightning wasn't bluffing; she would plunge this vase through his body!

"Your little games amuse me so—" Caius suddenly appeared behind her. "But not enough."

Spinning around, Lightning smashed the vase against his armor. Nothing. Instead, her hand collided with his armor, cracking her knuckles in an awkward position. She cursed feeling the remaining glass shards dig into her skin forcing pools of blood to seep through. Caius took her hand.

"Foolish woman."

Profanities exploded out of Lightning's mouth once Caius gripped her hand, crushing it with his strength. With her free hand, she tried to pry off his hand to no avail. He caught her other hand and they too, succumbed to his crushing strength. Biting her lip, she struggled but the pain shot through her body like poison arrows. Twisting her arms behind her back, he managed to lock her hands within one hand while his free hand yanked her hair back.

"Fool," he whispered.

"Scum!" Lightning hissed. She yelped once he tightened his grip around her hands once again.

"Let me tell you of a little secret, Lightning," Leaning closer to her ear, he spoke slowly, "Do you remember the day your parents disappeared?"

Lightning's eyes widened.

"Remember that very moment you heard the news of a shadow consuming while they screamed? It was I who took them away from you, crushed their hearts and threw them into death."

Lightning's eyes watered but her heart screamed with rage. Drop by drop tears slipped down her cheek and onto the glass covered rug. Shaking her head, she remembered the news all too well; images flashed through her mind of the funeral cloaked in mist.

"They did not struggle. I took them away from you knowing you will be the one who will learn about their tragedy. I pity you not."

"You…" Lightning muttered. "I will kill you."

Yanking back her hair, he met her lips. "I have a proposal, Lightning. Why not you begin behaving and perhaps Serah's life will be spared? Surely you do not want to witness your sister's corpse, do you?"

"Monster!" Lightning shrieked. With every ounce of strength left in her body, Lightning spoke, "I will kill you, Caius Ballad! Mark my words, I will—"

Caius crushed her hands and threw her on the ground. Landing on her hands, Lightning cradled her hands. She dared not look at her crippled hands; instead, she pushed her fingers against her chest and sobbed.

"How will you kill me when you can no longer hold a weapon, Lightning?" Caius said smugly. "I look forward to the day you can hold a sword and drive it through my heart."

Watching him consumed by black smoke, Lightning screamed.

Shaking her head, Lightning battled through tears, "Mark my words, Caius Ballad, I will end your life! I _will_ kill you. You shall never harm another life as long as I remain breathing!"


	3. Nothing to Lose —Part 3—

**A/N:** I'd like to extend a **big thank you** and hugs for everybody who reviewed/favorite/alert! I never thought this story would get this much attention since it's just a fragment of my dream, honestly! Thank you for all your comments :D But holy, in my initial draft, the story was supposed to have ended already! Wow, I never thought that my dreams continued! Here's the next installment of _Nothing to Lose. _This one will be short… as saying goes… 'the calm before the storm'.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

**Summary: **The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell.

* * *

><p><strong>Nothing to Lose (Part 3)<strong>

Lightning dipped her hands into the medicinal green pool with the surface of the water rippling from fallen tears. No matter how much she battled against the pain, her mind took her back to the moment Caius crushed her hands. Unable to look at her fingers directly, green strings of light slithered across her hands mending her fingers one by one. The stinging sensation forced Lightning to bit her lip, teeth digging into her flesh. The healing process was not painless as she believed; the throbbing pain forced the edge of Lightning's eyes to water. There were absolutely no words to describe the amount of agony she felt; her fingers felt as if they were constantly being crushed by a door, determined to cripple her permanently. Gently moving her fingers beneath the surface of the water, Lightning breathed, preparing herself for the worse and removed her hands. Her hands appeared normal, watching the last trace of magic do its job. Moving each finger, something was off. Testing her fears, Lightning removed herself from the sink, venturing into the darkened, floral wallpaper covered bedroom. Spotting a rose stem, she picked it up, pinching the green stalk with her fingers. Only when she grasped the stem she instantly dropped it. Petals scattered across her feet.

"Why?" Lightning questioned aloud.

Bending down, she tried picking up the stalk again yet, the results were the same; Lightning was unable to grasp properly. Moving her fingers, they felt normal but the joints felt stiff. Her wrist pained from the slightest movement. Flicking her wrist, pain bolted up her arm. Wincing, Lightning braced herself against a round table cradling her fingers internally cursing at the man responsible for this misery.

"Caius Ballad, what did you do to me?" Lightning mouthed, words filled with hatred. "I—I can't…"

Pushing off the table, Lightning dropped her hands by her side and scanned the room. No, she would _not_ give up! She'd be damned if she could not use a weapon to defend herself.

"Damn it," Lightning cursed.

Her eyes scanned the room for an alternative weapon. Lightning marched and opened closets proving to be pointless, to her dismay; they were empty. Slamming those shut, she looked around for the next alternative. Walking to the mattress, she gazed upon its soft silky surface. Mumbling "What the heck," aloud, she slipped her fingers beneath the mattress and using her leg to support its weight. Her efforts were rewarded; the gunblade she once carried was present. Quickly snatching it, she ran her fingers over the silvery surface. Carefully holding it, she snapped a joint revealing five silver bullets waiting to be discharged.

"I missed you," Lightning spoke. Slightly feeling foolish, Lightning whispered, "You're my only friend, you know that?"

Snapping the joint back into its original position, Lightning picked up the pillow and placed the gunblade beneath it. Already, a wave of relief washed over her yet, her grim expression remains unchanged; how was she supposed to wield a weapon with maimed hands? If holding a simple thorn stemmed rose proved challenging, what would happen if she attacked Caius with a weapon? She knew, even at the slightest tight grasp of the blade, her wrist throbbed and to think, she was going to use this blade and kill him.

Releasing an unexpected yawn, Lightning headed to the silver candlelight stands, blowing out each candle. Bit by bit, darkness crept into her room halting at Lightning's bed frame. Looking left and right, she made sure she was alone before her eyes closed to rest. Placing her hands on her chest, Lightning breathed and mentally recited a calming mantra. In a turbulent world filled with timelessness, chaos and despair, even for a brief moment, Lightning wished for escape. Her mind slowly dove deep, fishing out forgotten nightmares.

"_Mom… Dad?" Lightning called out at the two distant figures cloaked in mist. "Are you there?"_

_ The two figures approached Lightning, footsteps echoing in the dark. Voices carried through the mist to reminding Lightning these were her parents. How long has it been since she heard the sound of their voices? Years? Perhaps. Taking a bold step forward, then another, Lightning broke out into a sprint. Her boots splashed in puddles running as quickly as she could to them. Extending her hand, she knew it was them; she knew it was her parents! Yet, no matter how long she ran for, she was unable to reach them. Tripping, Lightning grunted, and looked up. She was at the base of their feet. Unable to see their faces, Lightning slowly pushed herself up before crimson rain fell on her hands._

"_W-What…?"_

_ One droplet. Two droplets. Three droplets of blood fell on Lightning's hand. Travelling up the blood stained legs, Lightning's eyes widened in horror at the sight of a large crimson stained sword protruding out of the mystery man's chest. _

"_D-Dad…?"_

_ The sword ripped the man in half. Lightning quickly regained her composure and backed away from the halved body. Snapping her head, she watched the sword thrust through the woman's heart. She too, was ripped in half. No words left Lightning's dried lips. The body was thrown the side revealing a man clothed in black gripping onto the sword with blood droplets sliding off the menacing purple eye. Lightning gritted her teeth and pushed herself up until her neck was caught in his powerful grasp, ready to crush her throat._

"_Lightning," he spoke coldly. _

_ Clawing his hand, Lightning was unable to speak other than produce grunts. His eyes glowed red._

"_My blade craves for your blood, Warrior Goddess."_

Lightning bolted out of bed, heaving and instinctively covered her abdomen. The storms in Valhalla grew violent, whipping the wind against the window. Lightning's fingers rested on her abdomen, expecting to see a large grotesque scar but there was nothing. Expelling a relief, she shook her head and wiped sweat off her forehead. The lingering feeling left from the nightmare disturbed Lightning. She was positive Caius was going to kill her. Placing a hand over her heart, the organ inside was beating out of control. Shaking her head, Lightning pushed off the bed heading to the window. Pressing her fingers up against it, the time for decisions had arrived. Was she going to make the first move or wait for Caius? Fixated on the raindrops slamming against the window, Lightning could not stop wondering if the rain was an omen. Something deep down told her something big was about to happen. Could it be the rain in Valhalla symbolized the blood spilling out of her body like a never ending stream?

The thought of death flashed through her mind abruptly. Had her time to die come? Perhaps. Was she afraid of death? Maybe. After all, she was human. Rubbing her arms, she leaned against the cold window until a plan sprouted in her mind. Lightning blinked; she did not just think of that, did she? No, it was a mistake. Rubbing her arms some more, there was absolutely no way she could offer herself in exchange for his death although it would mean freedom would be granted.

"Serah will survive," Lightning said.

Battling with her thoughts did not sit well with Lightning. What other choices did she have? She could not possibly seduce him; she was not that type of woman. The choices were bleak. The other alternative was play along with Caius' games and strike him when he least expected it. Yet, that idea alone proved difficult to believe. Caius was not stupid; he would know the precise moment Lightning was deceiving him.

"If I were to live, Serah will die…" Lightning trailed off. "But if I were to cave in to his desires, Serah will live and change the future…"

Choices after choices brewed in Lightning's mind yet there was only one which stood out: cave in to his desires. She hated, no, despised the idea but if it meant Serah's life would be spared, Lightning would do it. Closing her eyes, Lightning listened to the sound of clapping thunder.

_Serah, if we ever meet… I may not be the same person you know. Forgive me._

Listening to thunder once again, Lightning drifted off to sleep praying to not lose herself in the distant future to come.


	4. Nothing to Lose —Part 4—

**A/N:** Hi, all! Thanks again for the wonderful comments! I'm sorry to say that this story is coming to an end, very, very soon :( I don't mean to break your hearts but there is a possibility that this story will have a sequel? I have no clue! :) Anyway, This chapter is the one that's rated **M** so yeah, I guess I don't have to say more about it.

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

**Summary: **The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell.

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><p><strong>Nothing to Lose (Part 4)<strong>

Upon nightfall the storms in Valhalla grew violent tearing the shoreline; black sands exploding under the assault of white foam as water rushed into exposed crevasses. Upon the sound of thunder, Caius pushed the door open breaking the silence of Lightning's room. Cold eyes landed on the sleeping warrior, resting by the window unaware of his presence. Her physique, hidden beneath the thin gown illuminated once the moon peered around storm clouds. Locking the door behind him, he removed the sword from his back leaning the monstrosity against the wall. Walking towards the sleeping warrior, he ensured it was no trick. Her reflection showed her eyebrows knitted. Perhaps she ventured through a mystical dream of sorts, encased with happiness and hopes, away from the approaching nightmare. Placing his hands on her, he spun her toward him expecting her to wake up then slap him. Nothing.

Leaning close to her, he whispered, "Time to wake up from reality, dear Lightning. May the dream take you to a world where only nightmares exist."

Carrying her to the mattress, he observed her breathe, bosom rising up and down in rhythm. Holding her chin, he turned her face to the side exposing the grotesque scar mark. Running a hand over it, green magic slipped across the wound, weaving into her skin. Once his finger left her skin, no such mark remained as a reminding Lightning of her defeat. Darkness concealed his expression gazing upon the warrior. Pulling her close to him, her head rested on his shoulder with her hair concealing her face. Hands moved to the back of her neck untying laces; one by one each slid against her skin falling lifeless against her back. Moving a hand to her back, the last ribbon was loosened; a silver item dropped into the palm of his hand.

"Dear Lightning... You will share this realm of eternal solitude with me until death do us part."

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><p>Lightning's eyes twitched, slowly coming to after falling asleep, listening to the sounds of the roaring skies. How long was she out? Commanding her limbs to move, they suddenly remained unresponsive. Her body felt bare, cold yet warm in the same time. Sensing a strange aura, Lightning glanced up and met Caius' eyes. She remained still, feeling his hands pin her wrists. On the floor was her gown, tossed in his armor. Slightly startled, she quickly remained calm remembering something extremely important: her plan.<p>

Caius leaned forward and whispered, "You're awake,"

Silence.

"Will you not question what I may do to you?" A hand traced the side of her jaw, finishing its journey on her lips.

Unaffected by his words, Lightning remained unmoved. She figured: if she played along, he would drop his guard. Perhaps it was wishful thinking but it was worth a shot.

"No." Lightning spoke firmly.

"Pity. I was expecting you to plead."

She immediately tensed feeling fingers exploring her physique. She knew all too well if she resisted, his temptations would flare.

"I pity you for being like this," Caius spoke softly, nibbling on her shoulder. "You will never see your sister again."

"…"

"Such a tragedy… she didn't even stand a chance…"

His words stung her like poison. "What are you talking about?"

Caius stroked the side of her body, landing a hand on her waist. Smirking in the darkness, he could not help but feel a sense of victory against Lightning's crumbling defeat.

Leaning dangerously close to her ear, he whispered the words she never wanted to hear. "I killed your sister."

Whipping his arm to the side, Lightning hesitantly moved her eyes to the swirling grey portal showing visuals of Serah, walking alone in a lifeless land. Trees arched over imitating claws and the sand continued to crumble with every taken step. Serah looked left and right for signs of life yet, all she could see was an endless sea of crumbling sand. The skies were grey, the sun did not exist except the wind, blowing away sand into a never ending vortex of nothingness. Lightning focused on black smoke, slithering behind her—

"**Serah!**" Lightning shouted.

It was too late; blood splattered across the salt sands. Lightning's eyes widened in horror watching Caius effortlessly lifted up Serah impaled deeply on Ragnarok. Ribbons of red slipped around the blade's grooves and dripped off Serah's lifeless arm. Lightning watched in despair Serah's body thrown off the edge of the cliff.

"Your sister did not stand a chance,"

The visions did not cease. One by one, images flashed through portals of her friends succumbing to swift death. Lightning was unable to turn her eyes away from each murder. Fixated on each bloodbath, the corner of her eyes watered unable to erase the memories. The last images was Cocoon; the once utopia in the sky crumbling into dust. Crystal shards exploded across the bruised terrain with blue shards raining from the sky. Red liquid slithered across the dirt landscape with bodies thrown off Cocoon in the thousands if not, millions. Lightning's fingers moved, folding into firm fists. Meeting Caius' eyes, Lightning cursed him to hell! Lightning was about to throw a punch until realizing all too late her right hand was securely bound. Moving blue eyes to her right wrist, she was tightly bound against the black metal bed post. Moving her fingers, she felt the restriction in her muscles. What bothered her more was the cloth which bound her wrists. It was belonged to Caius. Caught within his grasp, Lightning opened her mouth but instead, he muffled her words with his lips.

"What will you do to me, Lightning?" Caius questioned. "On your back and bound to the bed, what will you do? Absolutely nothing."

"Why do you want to murder millions of innocent lives? Why?"

"That is something that does not concern you, Warrior Goddess. But…" Caius lowered his voice. "Murdering your friends or rather, comrades brought me much joy. Knowing you will be the one to ultimately witness their deaths brought me joy."

"You black hearted beast!" Lightning tightened her left hand but she instantly winced; cursing beneath her breath, she remembered when Caius violently crushed her hands along with her wrists. Even if her wrists fully healed, they would not be the same.

Turning his attention to Lightning's left hand, he could not help but throw out a remark she believed he did not know.

"If I'm not mistaken, Lightning, your left hand is weaker than your right, is that so?"

Lightning's eyes widened. It was true; her left hand was _much_ weaker than her right from an accident she had years ago. She remembered it all too well landing awkwardly on her wrist. Since that day she was unable to use her left hand to its full potential. Instead, she focused on casting spells with her left hand as much as it continued to pain her years later. Lightning over the years tried to strengthen her left hand but all attempts failed yet all was not lost; her right hand proved to be extremely versatile in combat.

Lightning narrowed her eyes. "Damn you. Damn you to hell."

Unmoved, Caius pushed her down deeper into the mattress, assaulting her with kisses. Lightning wasn't having any of it! He paid no attention to Lightning's verbal abuses. Gaining control of her once again, his grip tightened around her wrist.

"Keep this up and you will have more than broken hands, Lightning."

Lightning spat in his face.

"Hmph, I chose well… You are worthy of becoming my bride,"

Parting her legs with his fingers, Lightning thrashed violently knowing of his intentions. Delivering a firm kick on his torso, he gripped onto her ankle and slightly twisted it enough for Lightning to cease her thrashing. Biting her lip, she ignored the pain but with another twist, she momentarily stopped.

"My bride, my beautiful bride… The one who will never leave my side."

Her body tensed feeling the intrusion. Snapping her head away, she bit her lip digging her nails into the bed sheet. The sensations rushing through her body were new, one of which she never felt before. It wasn't of pleasure but it was something more. Biting her lip, the pace quickened. She tried moving her legs, even a little yet all her efforts were in vain. Leaning in closer, he positioned her leg over his shoulder.

Placing a kiss on her knee Caius spoke quietly, "May this union remain eternal."

Snatching Lightning's left hand, Caius slipped on a silver black ring. Running a finger over it, inscriptions burned through the ring onto Lightning's flesh. Desperately trying to pull her fingers away, Caius' eyes glowed sealing their bond. Once the spell was complete, Lightning snatched away her fingers desperately pulling on the ring. No matter how much she tugged on it, the ring remained motionless. Gripping her jaw, he forced her to look at him.

"I will never be your bride," Lightning hissed. "I will _never_ love a man such as you. A man who murdered innocents. A man who murdered my family for his selfish needs. Does murdering my family bring joy to you?"

"Perhaps,"

"**Monster!**"

Lightning growled. Quickly snatching a blade from beneath the pillow, she drove the silver blade through his chest. Panting, she pushed the blade as deep as she could through his black tainted heart. He deserved to die for all the things he committed. Blood trickled down the blade, slipping off the silvery surface. Her eyes remain unmoved from his torso; why was he not dead? Lightning swore her plan would work yet, she never expected Caius to remain motionless. He merely looked down at the embedded blade missing his heart by an inch.

"Your feeble attempts amuse me,"

Caius effortlessly grabbed onto Lightning's hand slowly pulling out the blade from his chest. Lightning did not expect to watch his bloodstained torso heal itself. Twisting the blade out of her grasp, he threw it aside. Embedded deeply into the wall, Lightning was completely defenseless.

"…Why… Why won't you die?"

"You cannot kill me, Warrior Goddess."

The blood on his torso reversed, slithering back into the wound. Lightning's eyes widened in horror witnessing the wound weave shut not leaving a mark in its wake.

"Fiend…" Lightning spoke.

"Now… where were we?"

Maybe this was the first time Lightning tasted absolute fear. Unable to speak, Lightning felt his fingers interlace with hers sealing her fate from this moment onward. Her life would never be the same again as long as time remained frozen in a world where death prevailed over its subjects. Bound to a man she never loved; hell was truly the only way to describe everything.


	5. Nothing to Lose —EPILOGUE—

**A/N:** I'm sorry to say this fantasy has reached its end. Thank you for everybody who supported me since chapter one! Thanks again for your wonderful comments and encouragement. None of this could have happened without your loyalty and support. For those who PMed me, you know you're special, you know that? Thanks again! I hope we meet again :)

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything.

**Summary: **The battle had not begun yet it was already over. Crimson streams slid off Lightning's once polished armor of silver now stained with grotesque scars. Waiting for this misery to end, a hand extended out to her welcoming her to a new hell.

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><p><strong>Nothing to Lose (Part 5 - EPILOGUE)<strong>

Listen to the sound of the sinister seas sinfully speaking into your ears. Listen to the sound of the whispering winds reminding you of agonizing moments. Listen to the sounds of your thoughts crashing against the shoreline forcing you to remember the terror.

"_My bride, my beautiful bride stained in a sea of crimson never to be washed away by time. Only you will stand by my side watching the lives of countless innocents through time die by my hands."_

Hugging herself, Lightning continued to stare at falling debris from floating platforms, crashing into the sea. Ripples danced across the surface of the water then spilling across her feet. Mesmerized by the ocean blue, her mind was on repeat remembering venom drenched words and actions. She no longer was a pure maiden. Lightning was appalled, repulsed and disgusted; she was touched by a man whom she did not love.

Love? What was love? Was it a feeling that stirred from within gazing into the eyes of the one you believed you would spend the rest of your life with? Was it? Or was it a planted idea from a world devoured in illusions? Reaching to her dried lips, she lost count on how many times her lips were touched. Moving her hand to her hair, she moved it behind her ear and rested her fingers against it. The words he spoke to here were none of affection or emotion; they were words encased in poison, slowly killing away every ounce of hope Lightning may have had. Her aspirations and dreams of returning back to her own time—to her own family and friends were diminished. Everybody was dead. Pursing her lips, Lightning dropped her arms against her side thinking of her new reality: Caius.

"_My bride. My beautiful bride. Will you not spend the rest of eternity by my side watching the world fall?"_

Most, if not all her feelings vanished the moment she was claimed. All the anger, sorrow, joy—everything was gone. Lightning knew she was nothing more than a hollow shell. The thought of spending the rest of her life in eternity with him did not please nor disgust her. The thought of living forever never once crossed her mind. Closing her eyes, Lightning listened to the wind whispering her name. Falling back into the soaked black sands, she landed with a thud and opened her eyes. Droplets from the sky landed on her face and slid off the side of her once stunning blue eyes. Pushing her fingers through the sand, Lightning watched the blackened soil stain the once shimmering silver black ring.

"_My bride. My beautiful bride. You shall live in a world where I will be your only world. Live in a realm reign only with despair and solitude."_

Rain drops seeped through the gown, sliding off Lightning's skin. Her eyes were no longer visible to the world. Sleeping through the sounds of the rain, she let herself go. For the first time in her life, Lightning cried; she cried with the rain. Balling her fist, nails sank into her flesh, breaking skin. Tiny red rivers slipped into the grooves of her palm mixing with black sand.

"All is lost…" Lightning whispered.

Falling into a symphony of silence, Lightning's mind took her down a path she dared not to think. Only time will tell what may happen. Perhaps only time will tell if another life would be born into a world lost in time, deemed to be forgotten.


End file.
